Jun 03

When you’re trying to get pregnant and nothing is happening, the two week wait is the absolute worst. You feel pregnant; you don’t feel pregnant; you have all the pregnancy symptoms; and then you have no pregnancy symptoms. And Dr. Google is sick of you asking him if he thinks you’re pregnant.

So how do you survive the dreaded two week wait? Here are some suggestions.

  1. Ask someone to knock you out unconscious for 14 days or find a sketchy Anesthesiologist who is willing to give you some nice sleepy drugs.
  2. Stay awake for the first 2 weeks of the month and then sleep soundly during your two week wait. (Note: Call the Guinness Book of World Records to see if you’ll beat the record for staying asleep or awake the longest).
  3. Schedule an optional surgery like a nose job or lip enhancement procedure. Sure it’s not that great for your potential pregnancy but at least it will keep you occupied.
  4. Ask your employer if you could work overtime as in 7 days a week, 24 hours a day. Your mind will be too busy to think!
  5. Go to a remote island where there is no such thing as looking at the internet, Doctor Google or fertility “Am I Pregnant” message boards.

Want some more suggestions on how to survive the 2WW? Check out Reason to Laugh #915 for more unhelpful suggestions!

7 Responses to “#751 The two week wait survival guide”

  1. holly says:

    Wow, this is perfect timing. I just started the 2ww. Number one would be great.

  2. Lisa says:

    Perfect – I have my transfer tomorrow AM. These tips should come in handy.

  3. Nancy says:

    I love this post! I’m going to contact you via email because I would love to republish this….

  4. says:

    Ugh, that two-week wait is the worst. And because my cycles were so long, I kept testing negative right up until day 38 when I finally, finally got the BFP. But there really ought to be some test you can take immediately after. :)And then a fast-forward button to zoom to the next trying time.

  5. Carolyn says:

    Number one made me laugh out loud and cry at the same time. I’m so glad to know I’m not the only one struggling with this. It helps to see humor in such a dreadful situation.

  6. says:

    My 2ww is almost over. On Friday I get my beta. Here’s hoping.

  7. Gaby says:

    I am also in my 2ww. It’s HELL. I am constantly checking my underpants – half wishing for that implantation bleeding spot, but half-afraid that drop of blood will eventually gradually increase to that b*tch AF. Because that has been the case for me for the past, oh, almost 2 years.

    This really sucks.