Mar 09

Fertility Drug Instructions for ‘Estrace’: During your period, swallow by mouth 3 pills in the morning and 3 in the evening. When the bleeding stops, insert this medication into your vagina.

Welcome to the world of Estrace. A fertility drug that definitely deserves some special attention. Commonly used in fertility treatments and frozen embryo cycles to thicken the uterine lining, these tiny blue pills also do so much more!

  1. As you prepare for your IVF frozen embryo cycle, you will be delighted to discover that these tiny blue pills are taken both orally and vaginally. As you swallow your first pills, you seriously need to forget that these same pills will soon be used as a vaginal suppository. What a fabulous double feature! Don’t you wish all medication could be taken both ways? Have a headache? Swallow a Tylenol and then shove one up your vagina or in your behind!
  2. Estrace pills are smaller than a speck of dust. You think you swallowed one but realize that it was so small, it got stuck between your teeth (It equally gets lost in your vaginal canal maze).
  3. You always want to shove your vaginal suppository up as far as you can. Roll up that sleeve because your entire hand and arm is going inside! “No darling, I am not going to insert the vaginal suppositories in bed. I desperately needed to wash my hands after.”
  4. And for an extra special treat….Estrace pills are blue which means you have blue vaginal discharge that your RE conveniently forgets to mention. You spend the next day googling words like “Blue vaginal discharge. Is this normal?” It’s like Aunt Flow but only Blue! You really wish someone warned you before discovering you have a full blue vagina. It’s like you drank a blue cocktail, window washer fluid and enjoyed blue Gatorade and then you poured it onto your underwear. You now have to wear a pad so you don’t leak blue onto your pants. Hey, here’s a great idea. Why not add some food coloring and see if you can change the color to purple! Neat-o!

A round of applause for Estrace and all equally fun vaginal suppositories.

8 Responses to “#794 Estrace turned your urine blue”

  1. Dee says:

    Very, very funny :)

  2. Busted Kate says:

    Surprise! Looks like you just had sex with Cookie Monster!

  3. or just had sex with a Smurf.

  4. says:

    AHAHAHA! That is hilarious! I have so far only had to take it orally (IUI cycles), so I haven’t had this particular blue experience, but you painted such a vivid picture!

  5. Dawn from the frozen North says:

    So true, and so freaky the first time it happens. Whoever thought blue was a good colour for Estrace must have been a male.

  6. Leslie says:

    Laughing so hard I’m crying! So, so true!!

  7. Amanda says:

    I thought I’d heard everything but I never heard of this! You had me laughing in stitches.

  8. Damm you Estrace! My underwear is now all soiled blue!