Mar 08
Once you’ve joined the ‘infertility club,’ you also get an honorary membership to the ’soiled underwear club’ too….. Congratulations?
You suffer from period pantie denial (PPD). Every month, you go through a mild state of denial, refusing to pre-purchase tampons or those (extremely comfortable and not at all disgusting) pads which ALWAYS leads to underwear that has been…well… soiled. The longer you go through infertility, the longer you are plagued by PPD. You may even have a few “period panties” (PP),  saved just for your monthly occasions. You may even start wearing those PP when you feel your period is imminent or refuse to wear them, subconsciously believing that this month will be the month. And when it’s not, you slip on a pair of pre-stained underwear and sit in your own filth.
No doubt, you would rather not let your husband see your fabulous period panties. He might not find them as sexy as the thongs you use to wear when you were first dating. Now, those PP are covered with colorful red and brown spots and artistic drips splattered across your Wal-Mart panties. “Honey, don’t look in the laundry this month. My underwear has been soiled again.”

You are a proud infertile, and president and CEO of the Soiled Underwear Club.

14 Responses to “#795 You suffer from period underwear denial”

  1. Sherry says:

    That cracked me up! I am guilty of this, obviously. Laughter always helps. Thanks for sharing this.

  2. says:

    LMAO Yep, that is me to a T! So glad I am not the only one…

  3. Nikki says:

    Never be ashamed of your period panties again! Check out this line of period panties I created! And just like this site, they’re hilarious!

  4. says:

    Hahaha, I am grinning from ear to ear. This is me. My Mom keeps buying me new undies in bulk “They had a sale at Target…” and I put them away for the day when I won’t stain them!

  5. says:

    omg so awful but so true

  6. Amanda says:

    yeah… it’s embarrassing to say, but you seem to know my underwear drawer quite well. It’s so not fair. Just a stupid ugly reminder of a “failed” cycle when you pull out the PPD underwear.

  7. Busted Kate says:

    True dat.

  8. Anonymous says:

    true dat Busted Kate! lol

  9. Amber says:

    LOL… Walmart panties. We all have them.

  10. says:

    lol!! love this! i even become in denial while on my period. “maybe this is the last one and i’m pregnant next month! i SWEAR i got pregnant the last time i ovulated.” it never happens. but i ALWAYS think it. lol!

  11. Sharyn says:

    So funny and so true!!!!!

  12. That is totally me. In fact, I want to buy the Diva Cup but refuse to since I *know* that AF just isn’t coming this month.

  13. Kimmie says:

    OMG, that is so funny! I totally have a stash of PP’s and every month when I am 1 or 2 days past the expected arrival date of “Aunt Flow” I skip right over them and good to my “good” panties. And then every month I am aggravated that I have to add another “good” pair to the PP stash. But one of these days I KNOW I won’t need them. At least for about 9 months.

  14. says:

    Oh I was so thrilled to see my suggestion made it to the blog! And that other commenters have the same problem! When I was digging through my drawer, I thought of your blog and was SO SURE that I was not alone in my denial of the upcoming “event” every month, I had to submit it. Thanks again for posting it and best of luck to EVERYONE out there :)