During your two week wait, you are obsessed with your breasts. You hold them, feel for tenderness, lack of tenderness, examine your nipples, ask your husband to examine them, touch, poke, prod, jab, twist, turn and stare. In some countries, you might be considered a bit of a pervert.
Your poor boobies. They have been so ignored during the first week of your cycle. All you do is stick them into a bra and forget about them during the day. Then the two week wait happens and all of a sudden you are breast obsessed! Are they bigger? Are they swollen? Is one bigger than the other? Why were they sore at the beginning of the week and not at the end? Is your nipplarious area darker? Then you get a second opinion from an unwilling participant. “No, dear.” Your husband says staring at your chest. “ Your areola area does not look darker.” Still, you examine those boobies almost hourly, examining every spot and then asking Google if that’s an early pregnancy symptom. You could almost be a Mammogram Expert or even a Nipplarious Specialist at this point.
You know you’ve gone to far when you start feeling them in public. When you think no one is looking, you push and squeeze one to make sure that it’s still firm. But when those boobies start to deflate, you mentally deflate as well and stick those good-for-nothing, soft-to-the-touch, non-milk knockers back into your bra and ignore them again until ovulation begins.
LOL. I was just thinking this same thing in the shower this morning…as I stared at them. And groped them. And squeezed them…
i opened this as i was “pushing” my left one aside to see if it felt any different than this morning – JUST in case – aurgh!
Hilarious! And so true. I do this all the time. (I even squeeze them in the bathroom at work!)
It’s even easier to obsess when hubbykins casually says “they look really huge today, honey!”
I am so there!
HAHAH!! I did this in my bosses office with out even realizing what I was doing until it was too late. So embarrassing, LOL!!!
HAHAHAHAHA. This was me to a T last week. I thought for a second I was going to have to put a restraining order out on myself. And totally felt them in public. Too funny.
This is so true! I did this today, telling myself it is nothing the whole time. Even though my breasts hurt usually a few days before my period.. thats probably what it is. My rational side says no way, then my emotional side wants it to be true.
“But when those boobies start to deflate, you mentally deflate as well and stick those good-for-nothing, soft-to-the-touch, non-milk knockers back into your bra and ignore them again until ovulation begins.”
HHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! This whole post is true! I will check myself into the psych ward when I start leaving bruises on my boobs from squeezing on them too much. My poor boobies.
Jendometriosis: “It’s even easier to obsess when hubbykins casually says “they look really huge today, honey!”
LOL! My hubby’s the same. This is the big ‘perk’ of pregnancy for the guys! Wait … are you married to my husband? ;-D
This is so true!
hahahaha so true – I’m so obsessed during the 2ww!!!
I am so there right now!!!!
I am soooooooooooooo there!!
Not only am I groping them all day, but I am talking about them incessantly!!! One week into my wait today….. Boobs are huge. Hurt like hell. Been here before, that’s for sure!
hahahaa I totally push at them all day during the 2ww to see if they are sore.