The fertility nurse calls to tell you your pregnancy results are negative. SO WHY IN THE WORLD DOES SHE SOUND SO CHEERFUL?
“Hello, it’s Nurse Ovary calling. Happily, I’m calling to let you know that we have the FANTASTIC results of your latest pregnancy test!! It was negative.” You have been waiting two long excruciating weeks to find out the results of your cycle. And then the clinic calls. Whether she leaves you a phone message or you have the ‘joy’ of talking to her directly, you always try to decode the sound of her voice. Does she sound happy? Is her voice sad? Her voice sounds more perky than usual. It must be good news! Typically, the fertility nurse sounds quite happy and you might even make small chat before she gives you the devastating news. You may even think she’s kidding about your negative result because no human being can sound that cheerful without being truly evil. Hey Nurse, it would be a lot nicer if you just started the conversation in tears!
They should really hire this nurse out to deliver all other forms of horrible news.
“I’m so incredibly pleased you picked up the phone today! It’s fantastic I got a hold of you. You’re uncle is in the hospital.”
“It’s great to hear your voice today. Looks like she only has a few hours to live.”
“Glad I could catch you because have I got news! Your cat didn’t make it.”
And you can only imagine how Mrs. Cheerful Negative Nurse will deliver your positive pregnancy news one day too.