Mar 14

Have you ever gotten together with your mommy friends and felt really left out of the conversation because you didn’t have a baby?

It’s a Saturday afternoon and you are at your mommy friend’s house where everyone has a baby but you. The conversation quickly turns into mommy talk. “Oh my goodness, little Sandy had the biggest poop last night. Is a mustard yellow color bowel movement normal?” “Little Penny hasn’t pooped in 4 days. Should I take her to the pediatrician?” In mommy conversation land, talking about shit, poop and diarrhea is completely normal but you have nothing to contribute to the conversation unless you talk about your own bowel movements. “Hey, I just made a huge dump this morning. It was brown.” But no one wants to hear about that.

Mommies want to talk to other mommies and when there is a non-mommy in the room, you might as well be invisible. You can’t provide advice about her breast feeding issue, you have no idea what the Ferber Sleep Training Method is and would have handed her a diaper but you had no idea where or what the ‘magic diaper do-do center’ was. It’s like if you opened your mouth and talked about the color and consistency of your cervical mucus or your latest IUI. “My cervical mucus was simply splendid this month,” You would say (as you sip your glass of wine). “It’s consistency and texture was just divine!”

Instead, you smile politely, nodding your head every once and awhile while inside you feel like someone is ripping a piece of your heart. And the only way to cope with a broken heart is to overeat and drink as soon as you get home. Just try to erase the image of little Betty’s yellow and green stained diaper from your memory.

8 Responses to “#791 Mommies talk about poop, you talk about cervical mucus”

  1. Lisa says:

    I have a great friend going through this journey with me. Every once in a while we’ll work the following into a conversation: “What’s your cervical position today? How’s the CM?”

    Whatever it takes to get through this, right?

  2. Sherry says:

    Thank you so much for the levity!!!!

  3. Michelle says:

    OMG! I’ve been there and done that too many times to count. Thank you for your blog. It makes me smile.

  4. Emily says:

    I think I could have easily written this post—you hit the nail on the head. Thank you for this awesome website, your humor and helping the rest of us realize that we aren’t alone.

  5. Nicole says:

    Thank you so much for that! I love this site, it’s so true. I know the feeling of being the only non-mommy in a room full of baby mamas. It sucks! But at least we have this site to laugh at in the end.

  6. Stacy says:

    This made me laugh out loud. I just found your website adn I am so glad I did. I just had this experience with my girlfriends. I wish I had thrown out the comment about my BM. That would have made them think. Thank you for this blog.

  7. says:

    Excellent site

  8. yllal says:

    I also experience this. That’s why sometimes I feel not to see my mommy friends. Just to don’t get hurt myself.