Dec 28

Is it your period or is it implantation bleeding? It’s a special moment in your marriage when your husband suddenly becomes the ‘Sanitary Napkin Expert.’

“Let me see,” he will say as you sit on the toilet analyzing your red colored urine and spotting pad. Initially, you will refuse but since you have no shame left, you will let him see. He will stand over the toilet bowl observing the color of your urine and review your diaper-like sanitary pad. He suddenly becomes the expert in blood clots and your menstrual cycle. “The right side of the pad looks slightly browner than the left with a consistent circular pattern,” he observes. “And your urine definitely looks more pink than yellow. This coming from the man who once thought your Maxi Pad was a mini pillow for a small dog. Now, he examines and analyzes almost as much as you do.

If you don’t think this will happen to you and your partner, just wait. He will become the Sanitary Napkin Expert one day.

5 Responses to “#828 Your husband Inspects your Sanitary Pads”

  1. waiting and wishing says:

    Although we are not there yet, the part about having no shame left is spot on. I would have NEVER in a million years thought I would do HALF of the things I partake in as a result of IF. I guess it is in infertility and out with your dignity. We can only laugh though, right?!?

  2. Fertile Thoughts says:

    This is a hilarious post. I love it :)

  3. finding_ac says:

    yah, the shame has definately flew out the window! i have even argued with him whether or not it was pink, brown, or red….something i never thought i would EVER have to talk to my spouse about! lol

    ♥ ac

  4. misterivf says:

    bugger. this is true-ish, Although blood still brings up the though of "wounded" in my head, so I still think that mars IVF has cut herself open or something. None the less, your observations are stunning and incredibly funny and I thought my humor was dark!

  5. juniper76 says:

    No shame? Um, yeah, you're right there. Even my manager at work knows when a new cycle starts (since it involves missing work). But my DH won't look at a pad. If AF's here he'll actually call through the door to make sure it's out of sight before entering the bathroom. I think he's scared of it?