May 26

Infertility Definitions Explained….

Pregtember – the name of the month you hope to get pregnant by.

Corp-peeing - anytime a OPK or HPT is taken at work in the company’s Ladies Room. Anyone who has done this, I’m sure, has visions of the looks on their co-workers faces if they come into the Ladies Room the same time your watch alarm is going off after the 3-5 minute wait time.

Basal Instinct – an urge to shake down your basal thermometer BEFORE recording your temperature in a futile attempt to work up a sweat and boost up your temperature; usually strikes late in the menstrual cycle about the time your temperature would be naturally plummeting to indicate the on-set of your dreaded period.

Pregsplotion – the sudden abundance of pregnant women in your vicinity within hours of your negative pregnancy test.

“The Sperminator” – nickname for any friend of your husband’s who insists on extended sauna sessions after playing squash.

Briefectomy - furtive removal of all tight-fitting briefs from your husband’s underwear drawer.

Transfurryence – treating your pets like human babies.

Furrtility - when your cat gets pregnant before you.

Assincline – the odd-looking practice of elevating a woman’s buttocks after intercourse in order to maximize the sperm’s ability to swim for the egg.

Gluteus Unrelaximus – side effect of the uncomfortable act of propping up the buttocks after baby-sex.

Feather-butting - the ungraceful act of a woman propping her butt up on FEATHER pillows after sex to improve the chances of conception.

Reason suggested by fellow fabulous infertile Cherbear and taken from 


7 Responses to “#756 “Furrtility” – meaning when your cat gets pregnant before you”

  1. says:

    Ha ha!! I think I’m stuck in Transfurryence

  2. Cherbear says:

    Hey awesome! thanks for posting this! (and calling me fabulous) :-)

  3. Carlie says:

    This is hysterical! Love your site – thank you for bringing a smile into my day. I’m passing this onto others.

  4. HollyT says:

    I totally corp-peed every day this week. Luckily we have single toilet bathrooms. Of course, it may look odd that I disappear into the bathroom for 5 minutes.

    And Pregsplotion…love it.

  5. 21reena says:

    HYSTERICAL! I’ve quoted many a pregtembers

  6. Don’t worry about infertility, solution is available. so live life happy with lot’s of fun…….

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