Jun 07

The week before your expected period is your week of baby hope. Although we have convinced ourselves that we are not pregnant, we secretly think that we are and will not give up until the last second. We have all those fake early pregnancy symptoms and since we haven’t gotten AF just yet, we still have that glimmer of hope.

And then we see a glimpse of her pink self in our underwear.

We had completed a full toilet paper analysis and were content with the negative results. THEN, we decide to do one more innocent wipe and notice a slight trace of our period. Before complete and utter disappointment sinks in, we still have a glimmer of hope that this could be implantation bleeding. We wipe again and examine more closely. It is very light and when we wipe again, she has disappeared. We let out a sigh and our husband asks if you got your period. You say yes but secretly, you still have a tiny bit of hope that you are not sharing with your husband. Wouldn’t it wonderful if you could surprise your husband later and tell him it wasn’t your period after all? You imagine that little fantasy in your head. You want to do the wipe-and-inspect again but you will wait a few more minutes or a whole hour, if you’re patient. Good news! It’s still so light. It’s barely even arrived! You might head off to bed, feeling a little disappointment but not the full fledge, crying on the floor, hysteria that will come later.

You wake up in the middle of the night with cramps and underwear that needs to be thrown out. Full hysteria will start in the morning.

14 Responses to “#974 You might have gotten your period but you are still unsure”

  1. ashley says:

    Oh, it's happened to so many of us.

  2. Infertile "but hoping to be fertile" Naomi says:

    Happens to be almost every month.

  3. Mary-Anne says:

    How did you know what goes on in my life every month?! Wow…that literally is me word for word. I'm glad it's not just me, though, and that other women do the exact same thing!!

  4. Clare says:

    Yep, yep and yep. Though now as soon as I feel the cramps I've stopped kidding myself. The crying hysterically starts immediately even before AF has actually arrived. Fun times. NOT!

  5. jill says:

    saying lots ad lots of fertile prayers for you! it took us about 8 months to get pregnant with sophie (which i now know is NOTHING compared to what you are going through!!!!!! i am so in awe of how strong you are to make it through!), and i did the wipe and check religiously every time.

  6. infertileNaomi says:

    Love your comments. Thanks Ladies! Have a great week and be fertile!

  7. Fertility Chick says:

    This is the story of my life!!

  8. jen says:

    Amazing. I can't even tell you how accurately that describes my every month! Thanks for not letting us feel alone.

  9. Jenn says:

    I wonder what it IS like for those of them that just get pregnant.

    I had 1 positive and it was later negative–knocked lose by an apparent adhesion from endometriosis. Another negative but was positive but lost it whilest having a kidney infection…

    I'm not sure what it would be like to just have a normal pregnancy. I've mostly let it go but not fully. I just want to "know" for myself just once.

    Good on you for writing about it.

  10. Selah says:

    Yes so been there done that. Sadly even after a positive, you go on with the religious wipe and check. And even more sad when although she should not, AF has shown up regardless.

  11. Rach says:

    Or sometimes I even think I'm still going to be pregnant even though I got a period. Like what has happened to ever woman on that Discovery Health TV show "I didn't know I was pregnant"

  12. Monica says:

    So true! It Amazes me when I read these.. I feel as though I wrote this WORD for WORD!

  13. Gaby says:

    Wow, this is me every month. When I see that first spot of AF on my pantyliner, I quickly change it and tell myself, “Ok, that did NOT just happen.” As if putting a brand new, all-white pantyliner will erase that miserable red spot I saw earlier. 20 minutes later, another drop. I quickly change it again and tell myself the same thing. I repeat until there’s no denying that AF has arrived.

    Then I end up sniveling like a baby and cry on the bathroom floor.

  14. says:

    Amazing. Simply amazing.