Oct 18

Only an infertile could pre-fail an IUI or IVF cycle before it even happened.

Your procedure is scheduled for next Thursday but you already “know” that it didn’t work. You just know that the sperm count will be low, that the medication won’t work, that your cycle will be canceled. In your mind, it’s like you assume disappoint because you believe that you will feel less upset later on. News flash! It will still hurt like a bitch! By the time the procedure actually occurs, you feel like you failed it already. The first IUI or IVF, you feel hopeful, but once you get to number 2 or 3 or 10, you already ‘know’ that you failed it. Why bother eating healthy? Why not miss a prenatal pill? Have a cup of extra strong caffeinated coffee! You already know the outcome.

You – “Honey, sorry to tell you but we failed our IUI. I just know I’m not pregnant this month”
Partner - “But the IUI is not until next week.”

It takes a special person to pre-fail a fertility procedure before it has even occurred.

9 Responses to “#872 You failed your IUI or IVF cycle before it even happened”

  1. Jendometriosis says:

    that's me :PDH is very annoyed!

  2. Ariha says:

    Sighs..I know I would fail such a procedure even before attempting it.Which is why I have not attempted any.Yesterday I received a phonecall saying that one of my husband's cousin had given birth and it was only her first wedding anniversary.

    To make me feel worse my husband had to remind me how I would have been the mother of twins if I had not miscarried.I told him off by saying that I am living a happy life without having any pests in the house.While it was really hurting though to see anyone giving birth.

    But you know what because of this forum I stopped myself from crying and I actually felt confident.
    Thank you so much naomi

  3. Ariha says:

    I forgot to add on that my husband told me that a women is not complete unless she becomes a mother.So im supposed to be incomplete now.Grr

  4. Bean stalk ballads says:

    damn ariha… sounds like he needs a sensitivity chip… or 10.

  5. Rachel says:

    Pre-fail = overachiever?
    Hi, I just bumped into your blog and it made me chuckle.

  6. Danielle says:

    I am new to infertility. After my last HSG I actually showed a smiley face on my OPK. I was so excited, you would have thought I had gotten a Positive HPT but two minutes later I was telling my DH about all the negatives that could happen this cycle.Why are we so hard on ourselves? It sucks to be hard on yourself and it sucks when AF comes so be good to yourself!

  7. The Adventurous Writer says:

    Hi Naomi,

    Your post made me think of the whole "law of attraction" thing. If we think it won't happen, do we actually cause it not to happen? I don't know if I believe this – I think the whole Secret thing is oversimplified – but I often wonder if my thoughts that I probably won't get pregnant actually affect whether I do get pregnant! Some women believe that type of energy affects reality.

    Ariha, I just want to say I'm so mad at your husband! How can he say a woman isn't complete unless she has a baby??!! Infuriating, especially if you can't conceive.

    Quips & Tips for Couples Coping With Infertility

    PS I don't think I was funny in my comments. Sorry, I forgot this is the lighter side of infertility! :-)

  8. finding_ac says:

    This is an ironic post…ironiclly similar to what i feel sometimes…lol

    ♥ ac

  9. Ariha says:

    thank you darlings for showing me some undserstanding.

    Sighs I guess he was trying to get back at me because I called babies as pests in a fit of anger and he loves babies.

    But in the end he is the one who is most supportive of me especially when my in laws bully me. *winks*

    The adventurous writer.You seem to be feeling what I have been feeling all the while.But then think about all those unwanted pregnancies.Those people do not even think anything at all.And even us. We did not think in a negative manner when we first started the negative feelings just grew day by day.But even now in the corner my mind i think sometimes even the negative feelings might be one of the reasons why we end up being like this.What an effective contraceptive. ;-)

    If there were more women like us then the contraceptive business do not need to exist at all because we are superwomen who can keep away from conceiving.

    Baby dust to all of us.