Oct 30

You can return clothes to a store, exchange a bag of milk, and return most products with a receipt. So why can’t you get your money back for a failed IUI, IVF or other fertility treatments?

You paid, you got treated and it didn’t work. You kept up your end of the bargain but you didn’t receive the goods. When signing your consent forms, you should add in a line that allows you to get your money back should you miscarry, if the treatment fails altogether, or if your baby is born downright ugly.

Money back guaranteed for all unattractive babies. Hey fertility doctor, you hand-picked our baby, so why does it have Uncle Ned’s chin and Aunt Frannie’s pear-shaped bottom?

I (your name here) give permission to have an IVF cycle completed at your fertility clinic. I will pay the amount in full upfront but require a full money back guarantee should the procedure fail or if the baby comes out looking like my great Aunt Ethel. I also request an additional payment for heartache and suffering, cancelled cycles, and all other fertility clinic screw-ups. I accept pay pal and all major credit cards.

9 Responses to “#864 Can I get my money back for a failed IVF?”

  1. Jess says:

    LOL! Love it!!!

  2. Rachel says:

    Amen to that!

  3. dawn says:

    you are hilarious! Can I have you as a guest speaker or blogger?

  4. egghunt says:

    Tee hee hee! There would be no rich doctors if they gave us our money back when things went wrong.

  5. irrationalexuberance says:

    this is funny!!

  6. C says:

    So true!

  7. Another Dreamer says:

    LMAO! Wouldn't that be nice, lol.

  8. Shanny says:

    I agree! I want ma' money back…. or they can hold it for the next treatment =)

  9. I guess that to receive the credit loans from banks you ought to have a firm reason. Nevertheless, once I’ve received a credit loan, just because I was willing to buy a building.