#914 Great ways to avoid pregnancy

Aug 21

#914 Great ways to avoid pregnancy

Fellow infertile blogger, , blogged some great reasons about how to avoid pregnancy.

Here are some other great tips to avoid pregnancy for the infertile gal.

1) Make love often during your fertile period.
2) Monitor your ovulation by charting your temperature or looking at your cervical fluid.
3) Lay down for 30 minutes and do not urinate after sex.
4) Go on powerful fertility drugs and injections.
5) Try costly fertility procedures.
6) Reduce your caffeine and alcohol intake.
7) Read books on conception and how to get pregnant.
Avoid vaginal sprays and scented tampons that could kill sperm.
9) Make sure your partner avoids hot tubs and biking.
10) Exercise and eat healthy.
11) Do not use birth control pills or condoms.
12) See a fertility specialist.

Congratulations! If you follow all of these tips, you will surely NOT get pregnant.

*Disclaimer: Teenage girls, do not follow this advice.

11 Responses to “#914 Great ways to avoid pregnancy”

Busted Tube says:

2009/08/21 at 9:48 am

So… you're saying I should just relax, huh?
I hear that works for some people. Maybe take a vacation? I'll have to give that a try…
Jenny H. says:

2009/08/21 at 10:55 am

lol…I needed that after AF showed up yesterday…I'm celebrating infertile Friday by calling in sick to work
Minta says:

2009/08/21 at 11:53 am

That's the problem, all right. I've been doing all of those things! Had I only learned sooner that they were having the opposite effect of what I hoped!
Dani says:

2009/08/21 at 12:08 pm

Relaxation babies, LOL.
Michele says:

2009/08/21 at 12:11 pm

Sad but true.
MBB Founder and Editor Denene Millner says:

2009/08/21 at 12:50 pm

Soooo true. And thanks for warning the teenagers…
Egg Donation says:

2009/08/21 at 1:13 pm

So true! Like we infertile gals could do anything the easy way! For another laugh, check out this hilarious take on an .
Lorza says:

2009/08/21 at 7:07 pm

LOL!!! I like your disclaimer. What is sad is that there are dumb fucks out there that really have to be told that.

oh- I have one "now that you are buying a house you will get pregnant"

um, okay. Because I am spending two cycles worth of money for a down payment? bwwwaaa ha ha ha.
MK says:

2009/08/22 at 7:20 pm

Love it!
Shanny says:

2009/08/23 at 7:22 am

Well now THAT explains my success in avoiding pregnancy, wanna pat my back? lol
says:

2010/06/23 at 10:10 pm

I had a friend who said if she would have only known not to spend all that money on condoms when she was first married at 18- and very poor. She could have been rich. She finally adopted 15 year later.