When you start your fertility journey, your first test becomes the Hysterosalpingogram, or HSG procedure. During this test, the doctor fills the uterine cavity with dye to determine if the fallopian tubes are open or blocked (in other words, the evil doctor shoves a speculum into your lady part, pokes at your cervix and then pours dye down your tubes while you cringe and spasm with cramps. And it’s not some type of cool rainbow colored tie dye or a nice alcoholic liquid either. It’s a radioactive, vagina unfriendly drink).
Do NOT google this procedure. The Hysterosalpingogram is not internet friendly. You will read horror stories about women who had painful experiences from extreme cramping to fainting, and these stories will scare to your very core. “Mindy-Sue from fertilityhorrorstories.com says: “My HSG test was the worst pain of my life. It was like having my bikini waxed, one hair at a time” and Fallopia-Anne from fertilityscares.com says: “My fallopian tube actually fell out of my body during the procedure.” But no offense, infertile friend, if you google “hysterosalpingogram, is it painful” do you expect to find a good answer? The internet will never tell you, ‘oh no, it was a gentle and fun procedure’ when you ask a question like that. Stop asking google already. Google probably secretly pays their employees to scare other fertility patients.
Just relax already. You know, so it will just… happen.
(note: the author of this blog had her HSG test done and it felt like a mild cramp that disappeared in 5 minutes).