Nov 30

1) Rubbing a baby’s head against your stomach for good luck. Note: Rubbing a stranger’s baby against yourself will probably land you in jail, and you would have to stop infertility treatments so not a good idea.

2) Taking someone else’s baby. That baby looks kind of like you but you probably shouldn’t steal her. The mother already has 3 kids, she’d probably thank you for taking the baby. Let’s ask her!

3) Leaving your fertility needles in your mommy friend’s garbage can. Probably best not to leave needles in a trash can with few kids around. Save them for the birthday parties.

4) Commenting on a pregnant Facebook “friend” that you’re sick of seeing her ‘growing belly’ and ’soon-to-be mommy tummy’ photos. And remove your ultrasound profile picture too, friend!

5) Ruining someones baby shower to make you feel better. Maybe hiding the cake and all the presents in your car.

6) When a friend announces her pregnancy news, comment “Are you kidding me? I’ve been trying for 3 years and you get pregnant on the first try. That’s pretty insensitive, don’t you agree?”

7) Fake a pregnancy at work and then take the maternity leave as vacation time. Note: you might have to steal a baby to keep up the facade.

8)Steal some pregnancy and OPK kits from your clinic. Quick, the nurse just went into an IUI, grab some now and bring some back for all of us!!

9) Tell your MIL that you would have gotten pregnant already if her son actually had some sperm.

10) Tell your friend to remove her breast milk from your refrigerator. Would she want your husband’s semen sample in her cooler? Tit for tat.

20 Responses to “#844 Things an Infertile wants to do but probably shouldn’t”

  1. Anonymous says:

    number 9 is definitely me! MIL- stop asking me already!!!!!!

  2. Elizabeth says:

    #10 is almost true for me…we work at a church and our children/preschool director had a baby a year ago…when she was nursing, she stored it in the fridge in the church kitchen…IT'S STILL THERE!!!! PLEASE REMOVE YOU BOOBY MILK!!!!

  3. Michelle says:

    #9 is Awesome! and so very true. and I just might steal me some stuff from the RE next time.. my $50 co-pay should get me something. ;)

  4. OnceIwas says:

    #7 is tempting!!

  5. Jendometriosis says:

    #6 is sooo what goes on in my head…

  6. Anonymous says:

    #9 – too true!!

  7. Rebecca says:

    LOL. For #4 — I'm tempted to post MY u/s pics, too — "Look here's my fibroid and here are the four 3-inch cysts on my ovaries. Ooh, and here's my HSG showing blocked tubes!! Isn't this exciting?!"

  8. LaurenKauf says:

    Soooo number one made me laugh so hard I drooled out a little bit of my coffee!!! Probably because I could picture myself doing this when my BFF left me alone with her 6 week old. (not that I ever would, it was just a hilarious mental image!)
    #9 reminds me of a conversation MIL and I had when she was bashing on my baby makin' parts and I look at her and said "Does it ever cross your mind that your sons junk might be defective?"

  9. Dani says:

    #8 – yes indeed, and sanitary napkins, too, which is a shout out to post # 845!
    I fill my purse everytime I am there.

  10. hellokitty says:

    I would like to post the ultra-sound of my ectopic, just to remind certain people that we are all not fetile myrtles and that I cannot produce as many children as my sister in laws (times 2) have and/or will produce, as I am sure one will, yet again. And then announce their big news during one of my family's celebrations…as if to deny me a moment's peace without infertility. I am soooo #4, #5 and #9 (but FIL instead, who actually hinted that my issues may stem from me working. /sigh)

  11. finding_ac says:

    rebecca's comment cracked me up.

    9) Tell your MIL that you would have gotten pregnant already if her son actually had some sperm.

    - that is so funny! lol

    ♥ ac

  12. Kate says:

    You just got a blog award on Busted Plumbing! Come check it out :-)

  13. Claire says:

    Anoter vote for #9!

  14. Future Mama says:

    I purposly opted against annoucning on facebook that I'm pregnant. None of my "real" friends know… (But my fake… No that's not right, online ones do?)

    I guess I'll just one day post a picture of my family next Christmas not saying anything but like oh yea, surprise!? I don't know!!! I'm trying to be sensitive :o/

    I hope this is your month :)

  15. Sonja says:

    Love them all!!


  16. liberalgranolagirl says:

    Love #5!!!!!! :-D

  17. Energy? says:

    Maybe there is more going on behind infertility than the physical stuff. I found this blog VERY interesting.

  18. Nadine says:

    A friend of mine blessed me with her baby's spit at Christmas; she just wiped the drool off her daughter's chin with her thumb and forcefully wiped it on my forehead. "There," she said, "Now you shall bear a child." Oddly enough, it did make me feel better, but I'm not pregnant. Yet.

  19. Where is my BFP? says:

    #6 Happened to me but I didnt have anything smart to say back. I wish I would have found this sooner.

  20. I propose not to hold off until you get enough amount of cash to order goods! You should just take the loans or college loan and feel comfortable